Time to be thankful….10 things I’m Grateful for

So, as somebody pointed out yesterday on a bloggers site a lot of my posts are quite negative. This is fully a reflection on me and the fact that I find more humour in negatives than positives but it also did get me thinking.

British people are a nation of moaners, its a fact! Whilst Theresa May’s Dancing, this Brexit mess and Stricktly’s annual ‘Cheaters curse’ has us all feeling a bit sceptical about having anything to be thankful for if we look outside of the media that is forced down our throats I bet everyone can find at least one thing they are thankful for, here are a list of mine…..

  1. I’m hugely thankful for my Fiancee. The saying “I don’t like you but i’ll always love you’ flies around our house from both sides several times a week. Having said that I get to live with my best mate who I have the biggest laugh with and has helped me in the last year through some horrendous times. I’d like to think i’m a stronger person for it but, in honesty, I would NOT have got through it without him! We were fortunate to be able to get our beautiful little house a few years ago that is truly a home to me. Home really is where the heart is and i’m so glad I get to share it with the ying to my yang!
  2. My friends. I literally have THE BEST FRIENDS IN THE WORLD! This is no exaggeration! I have friends who I have met on nights out, literally spoke to once and now speak to all the time even if its just exchanging insults to make each other laugh (which is basically my relationships with all of my friends!). Believe it or not my friends are the ones I go to when I really want to moan and get dark but too dark for social media! Through Charlie I have met some of my best friends that will be in my life forever. Don’t ever underestimate the power friendships have on your well-being. They are the family you got to chose!
  3. My Family. I have had a best friend since I was born. She was 2 when I came in and took all the attention away from her and we have bickered ever since. Having said that if you are lucky enough to have a big sister she will be your bodyguard until your able to stand up for yourself. There is an unspoken ‘if you don’t grass me up I wont grass you up’ rule between sisters which, over the years, I’ve been massively thankful for! My little sister is an absolute diamond and has such an old head on her 14 year old shoulder. I have absolutely no doubt she will be a huge success when shes older. My Mom is an incredible woman who has overcome things a lot of people thankfully never have to go through but has remained an inspiration to me and I ADORE her! My Dad sadly passed away earlier this year which completely tore me and my sister apart, having said that i’m thankful for the amazing years we had with him and the amazing Dad he was! I still speak to him all the time and am thankful that I never feel alone because he is always there.
  4. Our Niece and Nephew are undoubtedly the most gorgeous children ever! FACT! They make us laugh and smile and the best thing is WE CAN GIVE THEM BACK! Its like having an overwhelming amount of love for a child that you’ve never felt before without the responsibility, sleepless nights and financial commitment. These children are what make Christmas magical. Its out first Christmas with our Nephew and I cannot wait to see his face when he opens his presents!!!!
  5. The family i’m marrying into. They are just amazing and have taught me a lot, mostly how to drink and ‘Man up’ which were my mother in law to be’s words! The Siblings, cousins, grandparents, aunties and uncles that come along with the family are all ace! I literally couldn’t have asked for more with them!
  6. Deliveroo. You have no idea how thankful I am to be able to get Five guys delivered! Those burgers are like nothing I’ve ever eaten! My love for food is close to topping my love for my Fiancee!
  7. Tango Ice Blasts! Firstly if you aren’t a fan we CANNOT be friends! I will take the brain freeze any day of the week to fill my belly full of blue frozen liquid! Its like no frozen drink I’ve ever tasted and has been known to be the only reason I have gone to the cinema!
  8. Having a job. A lot of people hate their jobs. I actually LOVE mine as a PA which is mainly down to my bosses who are the best people I’ve ever worked for! Regardless of the fact i’m lucky enough to love my job my main reason for being thankful for this is that I can pay bills. Financial struggles are horrendous, I’ve had enough money to be comfortable and not worry about bills and I’ve had NONE. Money certainly doesn’t make you happy but it does take some stress off when you know your bills will be paid month to month. Please don’t take any of the above as me no longer assuming i’m going to win the lottery. That is still 100% happening!
  9. I’m thankful for the summer we have just had. DO NOT get me wrong i’m glad its cooled down a bit but it was lovely while it lasted. Who knew that in the UK we would be able to walk out in a dress and sandals in July without having to take a rain mac and wellies ‘just in case’.
  10. The absolute most important thing i’m thankful for is to be ALIVE! I don’t want to sound corny at all but the fact that you woke up and are breathing each morning is the main thing we should all be thankful for! Life is such a gift and shouldn’t be wasted so do what makes you happy, start things you’ve been meaning to do but never got around to (Like I did with this blog).

EVERYONE HAS SOMETHING TO BE THANKFUL FOR. HAVE A GREAT DAY XXX

What gets on my last nerve?!

Those who know me will know i’m the least patient and probably most blunt person that ever lived! For this reason I thought id write a list of things that wind me up. These things may be trivial, may even be things others don’t get phased by but to me are HUGE inconveniences!

  1. People who don’t butter bread to the edges! Whats the point in a piece of toast if the middle is delicious and buttery but the outside is as dry as a the Sahara!
  2. People who give you a squash in a tiny glass. If I wanted a shot it wouldn’t be Robinsons! Squash should come in pints or don’t bother!
  3. People who are in an overtaking lane but drive slower than those in the middle lane!!!! MOOOVVVVVEEEEEEE!!!!!!!!!!!!! I would have gotten further had I have stayed in the middle lane you Moron!
  4. When SOMEONE (Not mentioning names but am definitely talking about someone who I live with that i’m marrying) puts his clothes not in, but next to the washing basket on the floor! PUT IT IN THE BASKET!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
  5. When Wagamamas write on the paper on my table instead of writing it on a notepad or order book. I find it smug and unnecessary. If you can remember what I’ve ordered why are you defacing my table!
  6. When I’m in a restaurant and the waiters wait until you’ve just taken a big bite of food to come and ask you if everything’s ok with your meal! I know what your doing, your waiting until I cant physically answer in case what i’m about to say is negative!
  7. When i’m at a bar waiting to be served, the bar staff make eye contact, they know i’m here, someone else comes to the bar and they try and serve them first. There are 2 issues here and I WILL be speaking my mind in this situation. 1. The person who’s just walked up to the bar can see you were there first. 2. What is the bar staffs problem?! Say bye bye to your tip and prepare for an ear full. Please note I have absolutely no self respect in making a scene. I guarantee 100% you feel more awkward than I do!
  8. When you whatsapp someone, they’re online but haven’t read your message. I know you’ve seen it and haven’t clicked onto the message so I don’t get 2 blue ticks. I WILL harass you and keep messaging until you answer!
  9. Friends who ask me to come to the toilet with them on a night out. Its a NO from me! Unless your wearing a jump suit and need help zipping it why do you need me to come? I’m on a night out not doing care for the community!
  10. Following on from the above deep chats on a night out. I want to show myself up and dance like a Muppet, sing Billie Piper ‘Because we want to’ like i’m auditioning for pop idol and make some all round bad life decisions. I don’t need your philosophical chat to get in the way of that. Bye Felicia!

As i’m sure you can imagine the list extends way further than 10 points. It would appear i’m rather easily irritated! Let me know what grinds your gears………………..

Hibernation Hype

Its October, Its getting colder, Its getting darker earlier, this means a few things for me:

  1. I wont be going out (not that there is anything new there). Don’t ask me, its going to be a no, I don’t care if its your birthday i’m not coming!
  2. If you text me after 9pm do not expect a response until the next morning, i’m asleep, its been dark for at least 2 hours, what sort of maniac is still awake?!
  3. If I am in the house i’m in pyjamas, on the odd occasion I visit anyone ill also be in my pyjamas. Basically i’m not getting dressed until at least April!
  4. Don’t ask me to go to the German Market! Please explain what is fun about standing outside in the freezing cold, paying a fortune for beer which I would NEVER drink elsewhere with nowhere to sit surrounded by crowds of people with no manners.
  5. Trick or treater’s are wasting their time knocking on my door, if there were sweets here I’ve eaten them! When you knock the door I will mute my TV as if there is no-one in! Carry on knocking…..I can sit and ignore the door for hours.
  6. Everything will be cooked in the slow cooker. This is my season for food, I want stews and cottage pie and soups and all the good stuff! If you think salad is acceptable in the winter you are an absolute mad Man/Woman!

In summary I hope you all have an amazing Autumn/Winter, ill be going into Hibernation as of Today in my pyjamas with a fluffy blanket and hot chocolate.

Ciao for now!

close up photography of fawn pug covered with brown cloth
Photo by Burst on Pexels.com

If this is as good as it gets…..

How many of you have said “I wish I was as fat as the first time I thought I was fat”.

I bet its a lot of you………

I remember being a size 8-10 thinking if only I can get down to a 6-8. Now for me I’m 5ft 7″ so a size 6 on me would have me resembling Jack Skellington from a nightmare before Christmas!

As time went on that 8-10 became a 10-12, then 10-12 became 12-14, 12-14 became 14-16 in some things. I sometimes think I wish I looked like I did 2,4,6 years ago but what’s the point.

Surely none of us are enjoying life that much if we are SO bothered with how we look! Sometimes if I’m going out and my hair isn’t right or I haven’t fake tanned or the dress doesn’t look as nice as on the model (unless the model was the Michelin man) then it can put a real dampener on my day/night.

Well today that stops!

Do we really think anyone gives a s**t?! Seriously unless you’ve decided to completely change your look nobody will even notice these little things we nitpick ourselves for.

Sure I’ve been on holiday in fear I’ll be harpooned on a beach. Sure I feel like a seaworld spectacle in a public pool convinced people are staring at the orca doing handstands in the water but in reality the only person that cares is you!

Surely as you are right now is the best version of yourself today. Based on my scale of deterioration surely I should enjoy this. No, I’m no supermodel most of us aren’t but if I carry on like this I’m going to spend my entire existence focused on how I used to look. Maybe this is the best it gets so time to work with what I have!

I’ve decided all that energy is wasted being insecure. From now on the focus is being happy and healthy.

I’m not going to start looking in the mirror doing a “I am beautiful” mantra but what I am going to do is start believing people when they say “your dress is nice” or “I like your lipstick” instead of thinking they’re trying to make me feel better. Last time I checked Becky was not my councillor, shes not on the payroll to give me body positivity but I bet we all do it. Do people really believe it when others say you look nice or just brush it off? Either way the pressure stops here.

Enjoy right now, none of us know when our time is up we all need to stop sweating the small stuff and enjoy living.

Happy Friday guys. Enjoy it!!!!

There are 2 types of girls in this world….

There are women and girls who really have it together. By together this is the sort of routine they have:

  1. Up at 5.30, smoothie and a run.
  2. Home to shower and wash and blow dry hair.
  3. Full body moisturise.
  4. Whilst hair is in rollers cleanse, tone, serum, moisturise, primer, concealer, foundation, eyeshadow, brow tidy, contour, blush, highlight, line eyes, line lips, lipstick, setting powder, setting spray.
  5. Put on the perfectly ironed outfit that was ready from the night before.
  6. Make the salad before work.
  7. Take multi vitamins and hair skin and nails tablets.
  8. Leave for work with a smile on her face ready for the day.
  9. Stops for coffee because she has enough time.
  10. Into work, bosses her day.
  11. Comes home, cleans for a bit, cooks dinner.
  12. Goes to bed around 10.30 ready to face another day.

Then there are women like me……

  1. Alarm starts at 6.30, snooze till 7.00, if I start to wake up ill pick my phone up and scroll through social media without leaving my bed or I’ll stay in bed and continue to snooze.
  2. 7.30 get into the shower.
  3. Get out the shower wrap myself in towels, get back into bed to put some moisturiser on and a bit of bronzer if I have a meeting that day.
  4. Full body moisturise? Are we going out out? No. Ill leave it then.
  5. Dry shampoo my hair for yet another day and throw on top of my head. By this point its one deadlock that wildlife could live in.
  6. Find whatever is screwed up in my airing cupboard and hope the creases drop out.
  7. Go to work.
  8. Make a pint of coffee.
  9. Don’t make eye contact with anyone until after 10.30 when I’ve finally woken up.
  10. Go home. Instantly take my bra off.
  11. Slob out.
  12. Make dinner.
  13. Bed by 9.
  14. Slob out in bed a bit more.
  15. Do it all again the next day.

Point is I will never have it together. I don’t think I’m alone in this!

I look at these women and have such respect that they can function in such a perfect way but the matter of the fact is I simply can’t be ar**d.

Have a great day whichever version you are!

Going out out, do I HAVE to?!

I spoke with my friend last night about going out and we couldn’t decide at what point the idea no longer becomes appealing. Why would we rather go to a friends, stand in a kitchen putting the world to rights, doing kitchen kareoke, having rap battles (based on true events)? Below are a list of reasons why I just can’t be ar**d!

  • You start becoming the oldest one in a club full of millenials. The lads have combovers and perfectly threaded brows, the girls are contoured to perfection with the help of a bit of filler and botox at 21 🙄 wearing body con dresses and LV or Channel bags that you still cant afford so all your thinking is “well where did the money come from to buy that?!”
  • Your decisions on a bar become based around if you have anywhere to sit. This can result in being FORCED to get a both, that’s another £50pp just to sit down.
  • The enormous bar qeues are just a complete waste of life!
  • For some reason taking my shoes off is frowned upon by security!
  • As is falling asleep mouth wide open!
  • More queuing for the toilet, a basic human right, which is rammed full of millenials re applying their contour.
  • So you’ve got through the above. Now it’s time to go home. You wait in a taxi queue. The taxi driver tells you a £15 journey will cost £40! You know they’re completely mugging you off but you’ve had enough, you have been forced to put your shoes back onto crippled feet! You need a wee! Just take me home Del Boy!
  • Next and possibly the worst part is checking your bank balance in the morning. You’re £150 down and all you have is a hangover and feet that are so blister covered they look like they’ve been dipped in bubonic plague.

Basically just don’t go out out if you want to avoid the above! If you do, come back in a few years and read this. I guarantee you will relate!

Me and my emotional instability….

In my early teens I would get upset about little things, boys, not being allowed out past 9 (up until I was 16!), the fact I never asked for peas on my dinner but got them anyway! 🙄

Next came the stage of late teens where I was so incredibly insecure and looking for approval from everyone and anyone! I spent these years completely paranoid about what everyone thought, I drank lager and black (I fu***ng hate lager) because everyone else was drinking it. I didn’t want to be the only one with holding a watermelon Bacardi Breezer! Basically I was on a mission to fit in and follow the crowd.

Early twenties I completely gave up giving a sh**t and had no emotion whatsoever, an ice queen if you will.

Mid to late twenties is an entire different ball game. I was fully in a false sense of security, I think my ice queen days just stored emotion about basically everything which began pouring out around 24 when I met my now fiance.

I recall watching Britain’s Got Talent, the relationship was new, I had bragged about how I’m ‘not like other girls, I don’t get emotional’. What happened next shocked both of us and proved me to be a complete fraud. Bars and melody auditioned. 2 young lads with a dream to sing together. My eyes started burning, I panicked, within seconds I was sobbing, like snot crying! This was the point I realised I HAVE LOST MY MIND!

The following years it became clear I was to lead a life on emotional instability. Can I watch BGT without crying? NO! Can I watch The X factor without a sob or 2? NO! Can I get through a John Lewis Christmas ad in one piece? Absolutely not!

I have now reached a completely new low when my new ‘trigger’ has become hunger. Something that can be resolved literally in seconds but I let it eat me alive emotionally. The video to follow was literally last week. I’ve hit a brand new low of emotional instability! Please lord let my 30’s be less emotional!!!!!

You’re 29 and you have no kids?!!!!

So, as I creep towards 30 i’m always asked “so…..when are you having one?!” Well firstly Sandra I like sleeping! How’s that going for you with your 3 sleep stealer’s waking you up at 3am, 5am and 7am? Because i’m getting 8 hours every night, sometimes 10!!!!

Why is it as you creep towards 30 so many people take an interest in my ovarian activity?! Shall I use your bowel movements as a conversation starter or is that intrusive “Are you regular Sandra?”.

Let me just point out a few things to those that actually have their s**t together….

  1. I will wake up as late as physically possible, you cant snooze a baby for an hour to ‘come round’.
  2. I already wash my hair as little as possible due to not feeling like an hour a day is a good use of time blow drying a head full of nano rings!
  3. As above its lucky if it even gets brushed and YOU want ME to be solely responsible for raising a child.
  4. I killed a cactus, a plant that is near enough un-killable, it died in my care, I loved it to death, I over fed it until it literally turned to mush. There is already an obesity epidemic without me bringing a new generation of over-eaters into this world.
  5. I’ve been on a diet for 6 years and in that time gained 2 stone, baby weight is not something i’m prepared to try and conquer!

So Sandra, the answer to your question is NOT YET, now haven’t you got a school run to finish or something?!